The other day I was watching the movie ‘Jerry Maguire’, again, with my mother. In the movie, the central character Jerry Maguire, a sports agent, has a sudden moment of epiphany in the middle of the night about his job and gets up to write a twenty-five page ‘mission statement’ titled “The things we think and do not say” about his company becoming more of a money machine and disregarding the feelings and aspirations of the players.
The title got me thinking too. It is so true. There are always so many nuances about a particular thing or event going on in our heads, but do we ever say them out loud? Why doesn’t a person say what he exactly feels or thinks? We all have our own opinions and ideas, then why do we succumb to protocol or much worse do not speak out at all? A system keeps going on and on, stuck in an unimpeachable loop, a system that was probably followed or apt in the antediluvian times, but nobody tries to change it or challenge it. You are supposed to wake up, go to office, slave away at something that you don’t even like and when you do get some time, you are too exhausted to follow your own pursuits. You are earning you say, but whatever happened to ‘you are only young once’ and ‘live life to the fullest’, whatever happened to your dreams and aspirations painted with a million colors on your minds’ canvas under the misted window on a rainy afternoon, ten years ago.
So below is my list of what I think is some of the situations in which we are thinking something, but what comes out of our mouth or limbs is a totally different story altogether.
1. We all make new year resolutions. Every year, not necessarily on 31st Dec only. I personally used to make them twice in a year, at the start of every semester. But I doubt whether any of us can keep up to even four of them, much less all of them. I could never hold on to even a single one, still can’t :(. We think we will, but that is as far as we get. 😛
2. Speaking your mind is an admirable quality. Honesty is a virtue. But what do you do when your roommate asks you, “Am I looking too fat in this dress?” or “Do I whine too much?”, you probably want to say yes, but that isn’t always a good idea (personal experience). 😉 The little white lies, that help you to get by, without getting fried. We are all really good at heart and never ever want to hurt anybody’s feelings.
3. Infatuation, attraction and all that blah blah, we all get bitten by the love bug at some point in our life, not just once, maybe twice or even a million times! But we are scared to open our heart and say it directly to that person we love. it is a big trouble in my country, I agree, because we have to think of not only of our parents’ opinions, but of all the relatives who probably weren’t even aware of our existence till date and even of the old lady living far down the street; where khap panchayats give a verdict on cutting off your own daughter’s head if she dares to fall in love with someone out of her caste, where love marriages are looked down upon as something near to blasphemy.
There is also the fear of getting rejected and being libeled as a loser or worse, being at the end of everybody’s ridicule and derision. The same reason why it takes so much for a person to say sorry and admit their mistakes. Bending a ramrod back sometimes can be very onerous, even if a tiny voice in our head tells us that we are equally to blame. But bow down and admit my mistake? I might as well swallow the bitterest pill.
4. At a workplace we see a colleague or a senior misappropriating funds, following illegal practices and taking advantage of their position to do all kinds of atrocities, but we never say anything. We are scared of angering the senior and about losing our job.
An official in any office refuses to hand out a form or help you with the process till you stuff a fifty rupee note into their hands feeling disgusted all the while with the leering expression on his face. Do we protest? We know it is wrong, but we still do it.We only want the job done, the fastest and easiest way, and the speed in which the work gets done is directly proportional to the thickness of the wad of notes.
5. I dream of being a superhero, minus the colorful tights. We all think of donning the billowing red cape and saving humanity, but we don’t have super strength or the power of invisibility or a magic wand to make that possible. So what do we do when we see a girl getting roughed up in the streets by goons, we simply turn around and walk away, its not as if she is someone I know and did I forget to mention the size of those men?
I really hope that we can be free in the truest sense rather than by waving the tricolor flag on 15th august under someone’s nose.